Our personal life story is never just a summary of facts and events. We as the narrator cannot help but interpret what happened. What is essential is how we integrate the facts and events internally into a coherent story which has characters and a plot line that weaves it all together and gives meaning to the events. We can explore how our stories are serving us, but also how they are holding us back. Our stories always reflect the beliefs we have internalized about ourselves, our relationships, other people and the world in general.
Who loves adversity and especially a crisis like the one we are all facing right now? Right! Our Inner Critic! Our Inner Critic is that nagging voice inside, which is trying to protect us by letting us know in which ways we are “faulty” or not doing enough. No matter how well we are doing, the Inner Critic will find something that apparently needs to be improved, and it loves to compare us to others who are supposedly doing better or more.
My e-mail box is overflowing with e-mail offers for online games, online movie nights, online network meetings, online community meetings, online social gatherings and there seems no end to this. There is a productivity frenzy as everybody seems to be moving lectures, groups and workshops online as fast as they can. And, I freely admit this, I felt myself being pulled into this for a bit and feeling the pressure and rush. But what is really behind this activity and productivity frenzy?
The media are selling us a hostile and scary world. We can unconsciously allow that feeling space of fear, or we can consciously choose to give energy to the resonance of gratitude and joy. The latter fundamentally changes the world.
Spiritual teachers, philosophers and scientists have been striving to answer the question “What is happiness?” for a long time.
Depression and anxiety are almost epidemics today; peace, joy and happiness seem more elusive than ever. Why is that? Are we perhaps focusing too much on the conditions, the relative facts of our life? Do we allow those relative conditions to prevent us from choosing happiness and fully experiencing it?
Does this sound familiar? “I only have so much time to make it all happen, to finish my education, start my career, find the perfect partner, get married and have children. I better hurry and make it happen—or I will be too old in no time.”
We disown certain energies because we have learned it is “bad” to feel or be a certain way. However, whenever one person is trying to bury an emotion, somebody else will express it for them. The more closely connected these two people are, the more they are able to feel and experience each other’s emotions.
Have you heard the Asian tale of the five blind men and the elephant? Five blind men come upon an elephant. They have never heard of an elephant. The first man feels a leg of the elephant. He says, “Ah, I know what this is! An elephant is a pillar!” The second man grabs the…
All feelings are good! Our emotions are our guidance system. All feelings and emotions give us feedback on what is going on. When you or somebody else feels angry, there is usually some other emotion underneath the anger. That deeper emotion or need has to be addressed. Just as we know we need to feed ourselves when we are hungry, we also need to feed other emotions or needs.