Snapshot Moments

Do you know that feeling when you can’t help but think your heart is going to burst? Driving home from dinner on Friday night with my family and two of my best friends, I had one of those moments which I call a “snapshot moment”. The kids started singing and in no time, all six of us were singing “Lean On Me”. My heart was overflowing with boundless joy and deep love. It was a simple yet powerful moment in time. And there is a part in me who takes somewhat of a kinaesthetic snapshot at that moment to eternalize this memory.

Sometimes a heartfelt experience is a small moment like being together and connecting through a smile, words or music, through love and trust; sometimes a snapshot moment can be an important moment, a significant episode.

snapshot moment 2

One of my favourite snapshot moments is holding my first daughter just after she was born. I can instantly recall the feeling in my heart which I had as I was looking into her eyes. It was the end of a five year long fertility struggle. She was a surprise baby who, according to the doctors, was not supposed to have existed. She was the greatest gift I had ever received up to that point.

A heart-opening snapshot moment is usually full of love, laughter, inner peace, deep gratitude, aliveness, flowing in the moment, feeling complete or having a sense of unity and bliss.

snapshot moments 3

Love is the impulse towards unity. In a snapshot moment there is no separation between you and others. Your heart is so full that there is no room for fear-based emotions like greed, jealousy, envy, resentment, anger, inferiority or not feeling good enough. We instinctively know the truth of who we are. There is no doubt that we are perfectly lovable and absolutely enough exactly the way we are.

In Holoenergetics® and Shadow Energetics® we use these loving memories to bring up heart-felt feelings in the centre of our chest to shift energy and to heal ourselves, others and our relationships through love. We do this, among other things, by embracing our dark or light shadows or by clearing and balancing the energy in relationships to each other.

Why do we utilize the power of love? Because love is the universal harmonic, the desire for unity. “While love can take many forms, its essence is relatedness. We can become aware of this relatedness or non-separation, which always exists. We can experience and feel it as the impulse toward unity, and we can express and manifest it through our actions.” (Leonard Laskow, Love as a Healing Force)

Because love dissolves all separation and smooths all chaos it is a powerful healing energy and the one catalyst for transformation. Our inability to love ourselves or to receive love from others is the source of most of our physical or emotional issues. As children we often receive mixed messages about love. During the process of growing up we are taught that we are separate and not safe. We develop a “me/us against them” consciousness. In her beautiful audio CD Your Heart’s Prayer, Oriah Mountain Dreamer shifts our experience by suggesting we say “some of us” instead of “they”. She then even takes it a step further and exchanges “some of us” with “part of me”. Hate and fear dissolve into understanding and love when we shift our consciousness towards unity.

Heart in Sky 1

Our struggles with love and with deep-seated feelings of separation are the result of our childhood experiences of conditional love or what felt like conditional love. Or we had experiences of abandonment, humiliation, rejection or betrayal. Those experiences lead to feelings of unworthiness, shame, and guilt that we are “not enough”. Shame, guilt and unworthiness breed physical and emotional illness.

When illness manifests in our body, we can choose to remain focused on symptoms and treating those, or we can go to the source of the disorder and transform it. This means going into ourselves, into our heart, to that part of our being that maintains the sense of unity instead of feelings of separation, isolation, fear or pain. It means choosing love, joy and peace within your mind and body. Nothing is more important than the feeling of self-love and happiness inside.

Being happy is the cornerstone of all that you are! Nothing is more important than that you feel good! And you have absolute and utter control about that because you can choose the thought that makes you worry or the thought that makes you happy; the things that thrill you, or the things that worry you. You have the choice in every moment.

—Abraham

What is your favourite snapshot memory? How often do you connect with one of those memories? How often do you laugh? How often do you hug your inner child and check in with her/his needs? How often do you connect with the love your true essence has for you, all part of you?

If you are enjoying my posts you can follow Greendoor to receive an e-mail notification whenever I post a new blog. All you need to do is to click the follow button in the right hand corner of your screen.

To experience Holoenenergetics®, Shadow Work, Hypnosis or Belief Changes through PSYCH-K®, or to take part in a workshop

contact Angelika

905-286-9466

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

 

Advertisements

The Number One Quality of a Healer

What is the one quality that all successful healers have in common? Science shows it is Love. Now, what does that mean?

Love is a very misunderstood word. It is a, “portmanteau” or “suitcase word”, a word which is an umbrella for so many different feelings. We open up the suitcase with the label “Love” and we throw all sorts of things in it. We use it from “I love chocolate” to “I fell in Love” to “I love God”.

Dr. Laskow & wife.

Leonard  Laskow  & his wife Sama

Leonard Laskow, MD took love into the laboratory and experimented with bacteria and cancer cells. His definition of this complex vibration is:

“Love is the awareness of relatedness

and the impulse towards unity.”

(Leonard Laskow)

What we love, we want to become one with; that could be food, nature, another person. There is a movement towards unity. Unconditional Love means unconditional acceptance and moving into resonance with something or somebody. Dr. Laskow found that going into resonance heals because unconditional love resolves duality to unity. The key to healing is becoming one with whatever you want to heal rather than to fear it, repress it or fight it.

When you strike an A tuning fork and bring it close to another A tuning fork, that second tuning fork will also begin to vibrate. Similar frequencies vibrate with each other. Just as one tuning fork vibrates with another we can also be in that resonance with each other.

Resonance is not an example of love. You can be angry with somebody and be in an angry resonance. However, when you are in a loving state, resonance is always present.

Love doesn’t create unity but it reminds us of what we tend to forget: That we are all connected, we are all one! This is a time of remembering our oneness. Love is awakening to oneness at the deepest level. We live in a world of apparent separation and Love reminds us of the illusion of separation.

In the lab, Dr. Laskow discovered that he had the greatest impact by coming into resonance with the bacteria, or in other words, total unconditional acceptance of the bacteria’s existence, without any judgment.

Dr. Laskow then introduced an intention into the field of coherence. Coherence is a stronger form of resonance; he explains that he became “like a human laser”. Love plus an intention reduced the growth rate of bacteria by 50% as opposed to the control group,

Everything that we resist, persists. Bacteria resists being killed or destroyed, but there is no resistance when they are loved.

With cancer cells, he explored different intentions. The most powerful intention, which brought the greatest results was for the cancer cell to “return to the natural order, harmony and growth rate of its pre-hyper active cell line”. Instead of focusing on killing the cells, he focused on them becoming what they originally were.

The more energy or feeling is put into an intention the more effective it is. Another interesting find was that by coupling a thought form with an image the results were doubled. He was able to reduce the growth of a cell by 40% instead of 20% when he added an image to the thought. He was also able to stimulate the growth rate by 15% with thought plus imagery.

The bottom line of all the experiments is: Love plus Intention have a real impact on cancer cells and therefore on healing.

Based on his research in the lab, he developed his workshops and called this technique of Healing with Love, HOLOENERGETICS®. Holoenergetics means healing with the energy of the whole, which is greater than the sum of the parts.

Dr. Laskow concluded that if separation is an illusion, it must take energy to keep the illusion up. If all this energy is released by bringing people back into wholeness, all the energy is freed up for healing. The energy of love is released and facilitates the healing. Love is not necessary for physical healing because the body knows how to heal, but at times just the release through love is sufficient for physical, emotional and mental healing.

Holoenergetics teaches a particular breathing technique to go into a whole brain state, in which both hemispheres of the brain come into a beautiful place of balance. He also teaches how to breathe into the space at the back of your heart and become an observer from that place. The practitioners learn to transpersonally align with another person from heart to heart. The most important quality for the practitioner is to develop and to hold that field of coherent love.

Holoenergetics includes tracing of an emotional or physical issue. Through the tracing process, we go back to the root cause of when a separation happened, either through an experience or an interpretation of a situation which crystallized into a belief of being separate, not good enough and so on. In the process, the experience and the limiting beliefs are cleared out and then replaced by what we really wanted to feel and believe at that time.

My personal favourite is the Holoenergetics Forgiveness Process. I have written many blogs on the healing power of Forgiveness. In this process, it might seem like you are forgiving the other person but it’s all really about you. Truly letting go of the energy of anger, resentment, sadness or hurt frees you up for your own healing, evolution and growth. And within that process, the most important person to forgive yourself is your younger selves. Judgment and anger at ourselves is what separates us from our true essence and veils what we are at the core of our being: Love.

 

Are you curious about Holoenergetics?

Darryl Gurney is finally teaching a Holoenergetics class again in the GTA:

 

Holoenergetics Workshop

Friday, March 6 – Sunday, March 8, 2015

HOURS:

9:00 a.m. – 6:30 p.m.

LOCATION:

Milton or Mississauga

EARLY BIRD: $575 or ($550 when you bring a friend)– if $150 deposit received before February 12, $650 thereafter (Prices include tax)

 

Who is Your Instructor?

darryl

Darryl Gurney

 

Who is Darryl Gurney?

When we have decided we want to learn a technique and take a class it is not always easy to choose which teacher or instructor is right for us. Some of us just need to look at a photo of a person and we can feel the energy, others might want to do a bit more research and go by testimonials.

IMAG1189

I have been friends with Darryl Gurney for many years and have sponsored his workshops in the GTA for the last few years. Over the years of first taking all his classes and then sponsoring them, I have heard others echo my feelings over and over again, “He is the best teacher I have ever come across in the alternative health field”.

What makes somebody the best teacher? At the top of the list are integrity and honesty. Secondly, a true desire to change this world. Thirdly, his strong heart-centred focus. He teaches with clarity and is a true role model. He truly lives PSYCH-K®, Holoenergetics® and Shadowenergetics. Many people can teach the techniques of a system, but I have yet to see another person who can connect so lovingly from heart to heart with every student in the class.

We all have taken classes in which the teacher was triggered by a participant, or in which we just didn’t feel quite comfortable. Taking one of Darryl’s workshops is a totally different experience. Darryl has done his own work for many years and creates a space in which every single person feels accepted and appreciated. The energy is one of non-judgment, safety and love. However, what stands out most about Darryl is his ability to make the entire room roar with laughter. His humour and wonderful way of looking at the world connects and unites us all. Everybody leaves with new insights, deeper understanding of themselves and others, and with the feeling of being lovable exactly the way we are.

IMAG1193

This is what some of our students are saying about Darryl Gurney:

 

I had the privilege of having Daryl as my teacher in the Spring and I was blown away by his expertise. He really walks his talk. He is so passionate about helping his students get the most out of his courses and grow to be the best they can be. He is truly an expert in his field. Thanks, Daryl!!!

– Jennifer Song, Burlington

 

Taking the basic and the advanced Psych-K with Darryl Gurney was a wonderful experience in every aspect. The courses were very well organized and the locations carefully chosen. The energy and atmosphere felt just perfect, right from the beginning.

Darryl is a gifted teacher. His fun and creative ways make it easy to understand and learn. Especially the advanced Psych-K is an intense course and a lot to take in. Darryl was always aware of the needs of the group and he would restore our energy with fun Qigong exercises.

What sets Darryl apart is his heartfelt personality. He has a special gift to create a safe space where deep healing can happen. He is not just somebody who learned a technique and decided to teach it. Psych-K is an integral part of his personal life and it shows in the way he understands and supports each individual’s experience on their own journey through life.

Psych-K has become an important part of my life as well. I feel very grateful and blessed that I had Darryl as my teacher and mentor.

– Julia Trenkle, Oakville

 

I have taken three courses taught by Darryl Gurney to date. I don’t think I can adequately relay what an amazing experience, each and every day has been. Although the subject matter is incredible, I do not believe that I would have absorbed as much or been as present had it not been for Darryl’s passion, insight, compassion and amazing sense of humour. The only words that adequately describe how I feel are “he has saved me”. I could not imagine a more perfect instructor for PSYCH-K.

-Karolyn K., Milton

 

I have worked as a holistic practitioner since 1999 and have taken a multitude of courses during that time. I first met Darryl Gurney in 2005 at a basic level Psych-K course he was teaching. I enjoyed his teaching style immensely and later took the Advanced Psych-K course with him as well as a Holoenergetics course and a Shadow Energetics course. Whenever I am able I retake his courses just to be in the great energy he creates.   I have invited many people to participate in his courses as I feel that he is the very best instructor in his field. You always come away from his courses with way more than just a technique. He gives his whole heart and soul to his work. Darryl teaches with love, lots of humor and a great depth of understanding of his subject. Whenever I am with Darryl I am inspired to be a better person just by his example. Thank you Darryl. You are one of my life’s great blessings and I thank God for you.

– Fern Wolf, Georgetown

 

I have taken half a dozen PSYCH-K and other energy related training courses with Darryl Gurney. He is a fantastic facilitator. I am a business consultant in Learning and Development and have spent over 20 years designing and facilitating adult training courses and curriculums and Darryl is at the top. He is fun, thorough, patient and very committed to the subject and his students. I really believe that Darryl is the reason the workshops are so impactful. I have and will continue to recommend others to take his workshops. They are fabulous.

– Jenny Rice, Toronto

 

When I decided that I wanted to learn about PSYCH – K, I did some research and found Darryl Gurney. I feel absolutely blessed to have been able to take the Basic PSYCH – K course, the ADVANCED PSYCH – K course as well as the SHADOW – ENERGETICS course from Darryl. I have learned so much from Darryl and it has been life changing. Darryl teaches his courses with integrity, expertise and humour. I have rarely met anyone in life that walks the talk more than Darryl. Darryl has spent years learning and practicing PSYCH – K and I have experienced that focus and dedication in two ways. First of all, the courses he teaches are excellent because Darryl knows his subject so well he is able to teach it with ease, in detail and with obvious expertise. Secondly, it is obvious that Darryl has practiced PSYCH – K in depth because of the person that he has become. He is able to love and accept all individuals. He creates a safe learning environment where people are able to share and express the various fibres of their being. That is truly where learning, healing and change can take place. I am looking forward to taking another course from Darryl where I can continue to refine, change and heal the fibres of my being.

– Beth Pearsell, Hamilton

 

UPCOMING CLASSES with Darryl Gurney

The easiest way to keep up to date on our events including all of Darryl’s classes is to sign up for my blog by clicking the follow button in the right hand corner of the screen. By doing that you are giving permission to be notified automatically by e-mail when I put up a new post.

Basic PSYCH-K® Training in Milton,

February 28 / March 1, 2015

Saturday, Feb. 28, 2015 from 8:30 a.m. – 6:00 p.m.

Sunday, March 1, 2015 from 9:00 a.m. – 6:00 p.m.

Monday, March 2, 2015 Optional Practice Day from 10:00-1:00, $50.00

LOCATION:

St. Paul’s United Church, 123 Main Street, Milton, ON

Saturday and Sunday $425.00 Early Bird, if deposit of $100 received by Feb. 6, $475.00 after Feb. 6

Bring a friend early registration is $375.00 each

Retake $100.00

 

Holoenergetics Workshop

Friday, March 6 – Sunday, March 8, 2015

HOURS:

Friday, March 6 from 8:30 a.m. – 6:30 p.m.

Saturday, March 7 from 9:00 a.m. – 6:30 p.m.

Sunday, March 8 from 9:00 a.m. – 6:30 p.m.

LOCATION:

Milton or Mississauga

EARLY BIRD: $575 – if $150 deposit received before February 12, $650 thereafter (Prices include tax)

 

Integrity, Cooperation and Heart-Centredness

An interesting phenomenon came my way over the weekend, a concept I had almost forgotten about: competition versus co-operation. The idea of competition comes from us being in a place of fear, from feeling separate and alone. Cooperation, on the other hand, is knowing that we are all connected and can help each other because there is no need to fear a lack.

I am very blessed to be in a field in which most people understand that there is enough abundance for all. When somebody approaches us because they want to learn or do what we do, we openly share. Ultimately, somebody has helped us along the way. We are what we are due to the support we have received. When we network and we have overlapping skills or talents, we trust that we can work together for the highest benefit of everybody. Beautiful collaborations have come out of that philosophy.

There is no need to fearfully hang onto what it yours, to be sneaky and hurt somebody else to have an advantage over them. Everything is energy. Dishonesty and a lack of integrity are in the long run going to come back to the person who has chosen it.

Experiencing that somebody in our field chooses unnecessary and aggressive competition and dishonesty over cooperation and fairness surprised me immensely. The woman who made this unfortunate choice is relatively new to the field of healing and spirituality and perhaps she has not understood, yet, that the Universe does not reward a lack of integrity.

Coming back from a beautiful networking meeting yesterday morning with a room full of heart-centred people who are all committed to raising the vibration in this area of the world has restored my faith in my fellow humans again and has filled my heart with peace.

As my friend, Matt Scherb, reminded us at that meeting, we only need 1 square root of 1% of the population to change the consciousness on this planet and the life quality for everybody. This is called the Maharishi effect, named after Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, who proved that one square root of 1% of a population practicing the Transcendental Meditation® technique produces measurable improvements in the vibration away from fear, crime, violence, competition and egocentric thinking to love, lower crime rates and less violence, cooperation and group thinking.

Another way of changing that vibration are the heart-centred workshops which my friend Darryl Gurney teaches. He used to be my mentor and is still a man I greatly admire, as he really personifies Love. Whether he teaches the participants PSYCH-K® (Belief Changes), or Holoenergetics (Healing with Love), or Shadow Energetics (Shadow work) he always raises the energy of the entire group through his role modelling and beautiful presence. Becoming a part of the PSYCH-K® family is an experience full of laughter, personal healing and insights, all while learning techniques to help others.

darryl

UPCOMING WORKSHOPS:

Basic PSYCH-K® Training in Milton,

February 28 / March 1, 2015

Saturday, Feb. 28, 2015 from 8:30 a.m. – 6:00 p.m.

Sunday, March 1, 2015 from 9:00 a.m. – 6:00 p.m.

Monday, March 2, 2015 Optional Practice Day from 10:00-1:00, $50.00

LOCATION:

St. Paul’s United Church, 123 Main Street, Milton, ON

Saturday and Sunday $425.00 Early Bird, if deposit of $100 received by Feb. 6, $475.00 after Feb. 6

Bring a friend early registration is $375.00 each

Retake $100.00

 

“The secret of life is BELIEF. Rather than genes, it is our beliefs that control our lives. PSYCH-K® is a set of simple, self-empowering processes to change your beliefs and perceptions that impact your life at a cellular level.”

– Bruce Lipton, Ph.D., author of The Biology of Belief, Spontaneous Evolution, and The Honeymoon Effect

 

 

Holoenergetics Workshop

Friday, March 6 – Sunday, March 8, 2015

HOURS:

Friday, March 6 from 8:30 a.m. – 6:30 p.m.

Saturday, March 7 from 9:00 a.m. – 6:30 p.m.

Sunday, March 8 from 9:00 a.m. – 6:30 p.m.

LOCATION:

Milton or Mississauga

EARLY BIRD: $575 – if $150 deposit received before February 12, $650 thereafter (Prices include tax)

Our Baggage Does Not Need to Weigh Us Down

The short film “Baggage” by Ivan Kander is the story of a special kind of baggage counter. People line up at this counter to check in their emotional issues.

There is the woman whose partner cheated on her after six months, the man with a messy divorce, the girl who checks in the latest “walk of shame,” the man who is trying to get rid of his paranoia, the woman whose husband left her for a “pole dancer,” and the guy who—once again—is trying to get rid of his anger.

These people line up here over and over again to check in their latest baggage. For a while they feel lighter—until the next time they have something to check in, because it appears to be too heavy to carry.

One man is in line, however, to reclaim his luggage. Why would he want to do that?

He explains to the young woman in line behind him that checking our baggage means we are checking everything in. It is “like eating ice-cream but it doesn’t taste sweet, just cold and flavourless.”

He says to the employee behind the counter, who does not let him reclaim his baggage, “I met someone who was perfect. It did not work because I checked my baggage. I checked it ALL. Taking the weigh out of everything makes it so worthless. The nice things she did for me were all lost on me because I was weightless. I had nothing to give her in return.”

Rather than “checking” our emotional baggage, getting rid of it, suppressing it, we can understand it. Our baggage does not need to weigh us down. All our past experiences brought us to where we are now. We are weighed down by it because we believe it is heavy. We believe we cannot carry it. Understanding it and embracing it is like buying a new suitcase with wheels underneath. Changing how we feel about what happened and learning from each experience makes our baggage lighter. We can pull it behind us effortlessly. It becomes a gift instead of a burden.

Our baggage is part of our story. Checking our feelings means building a shield around our heart. It robs us of fully living life. Instead of starving our shadows, let’s become conscious of them and accept them as part of who we are, whether we feel anger, shame, sadness, rejection or abandonment. By bringing it in, we heal and transform the heaviness. Our baggage becomes light.

We become able to tell our story without the emotional charge. What used to feel heavy can feel like a great gift when we have done our work. There are no “good” or “bad” experiences. They don’t mean anything until we give them a particular meaning. We can give them a different meaning at any point. We can love all of our experiences, love all of who we are.

For coaching and belief change work contact Angelika

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

905-286-9466 

The Power of the Parental Voice

Last week, I observed a number of different parents interacting with their children. I saw positive and encouraging examples of parenting, but also several devastating ones. It made me contemplate how we talk to our children, and what messages and suggestions we instil in them. Ultimately, this also made me ponder how we talk to ourselves. What is our own inner voice saying? Is that inner voice possibly echoing messages that we received in our childhood which were less than loving or supportive?

 

In one museum, a boy of about eight was standing at the top of an escalator, lost in his own dream world, just looking around. Instead of bringing him gently back to the present and asking him nicely to pay attention to other people who might want to use the escalator, I heard the father bark, “Get out of the way!” followed by, “Why do you never listen to me?”

It was at the tip of my tongue to say, “Because he is trying to tune out your critical voice. If you were more loving, he would listen.”

Not only does this father send the message that the son is in the way of other people but he also implants the suggestion not to listen.

The son learns, “I am not good enough. I am stupid or clumsy. Other people are more important. I am annoying to my father the way I am.”

 

In a restaurant, I overheard a snippet of another conversation. A father was saying to his six-year-old daughter, “No. You are the problem here!”

I have no idea what they were talking about, if the daughter was trying to communicate her needs or opinions. But no matter what it was, the father’s comment shut her up immediately.

What a depressing message to get! The daughter learns, “In my father’s eye, I am a problem. My needs, requests or opinions are nothing more than a nuisance.”

 

On a parking lot, another father was pushing and pulling his three-year-old daughter along, while the mother walked ahead and ignored them both. The little girl was just being a normal three year old, taking her time enjoying the sunny summer’s day. In passing by, I heard the father say impatiently, “How many times do I have to tell you to hurry up? This is a parking lot! Parking lots are dangerous.”

Another child, another devastating message. The little girl learns, “Not only is life not safe for me, but I am also annoying my parent by being myself and enjoying the moment. I am a bother.”

 

One could argue that the parents are just trying to teach their children to have consideration for others, not to blame others and to stay safe. However, all these life messages could have been delivered with love. Instead, they were delivered with impatience, judgment and harshness. The children did not learn anything but that they are not accepted the way they are. They might even conclude that they are unlovable, especially if their caretakers act like this on a regular basis.

 

As we grow up, we still at times have this harsh parental voice in our head, the inner critic that at times is useful and tries to protect us, but most of the time just beats us up mercilessly.

How do you speak to yourself?

What does your inner voice say when you make a so-called mistake, or when you are in a situation that you could interpret as a failure?

Does it still say “You are stupid and not good enough”, or “You are the problem,” or “Pay attention! There is danger lurking just around the next corner”?

 

Just as children need a patient, understanding, compassionate and encouraging parent, you need to bring out that inner parent who sees you with loving eyes. The inner parent can put your inner critic in its place. That loving, caring parental voice believes in you and in your potential. It’s that part of us that helps us to bring the best out in us. If you want to be happy and feel good about yourself there is no way around self-love. If you want to love others, there is no way around self-love.

If you want to succeed and live a happy life, you have to make the choice to separate from your harsh inner critic, stop being a victim to your own inner voice, stand up for your abused inner child and begin to parent yourself differently!

 

For Life or Spiritual Coaching, Belief Change Work through Psych-K®, Forgiveness Work or Inner Child Work contact me

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

905-286-9466

Do vacations make us happier?

I always assumed there was a correlation between summer and vacation time on the one hand and an increase of happiness on the other. However, after researching this a bit I found out that scientific studies show that there is no correlation. People aren’t happier because they can take time off or go on vacation.

I was puzzled. So I continued searching. What I came across next was a correlation of happiness and spending time with family or close friends. So the level of happiness is not dependent on the fact that I can afford to take time off or even go on vacation but it is dependent on how I feed my soul when I am on vacation. Deep nurturing connections, love, laughter, support, acceptance are a factor in my experience of happiness. Spending time with a partner you love, having fun with your children or people who you feel close to and loved by have the effect to increase your happiness.

Ultimately, happiness cannot be bought with a vacation, happiness can only be found inside us. When we accept and love ourselves and also value and appreciate those close relationships we have in our life we feel happier and healthier.

This is good news because it means we can keep that feeling of happiness throughout the year. It does not have to be summer for us to be happier. All we need to do is focus on the people we love, on our family and friends.

Of course the people close to us also trigger and irritate us. That is their job! They are supposed to help us grow personally and spiritually! They are mirrors for us so we can heal our own issues and wounds.

 

Do you have relationships in your life that you struggle with? Relationships that are less than smooth and loving? Do you find yourself misunderstood, unaccepted or unloved, or are you judging other people? Your partner or your ex-partner? Your children? Your parents or your in-laws?

Relationship Coaching, Forgiveness Work, Inner Child Work, Shadow Work and Psych-K® can all help you to shift your own beliefs, heal your wounds and create loving relationships that bring you happiness and health.

 

Contact me for a free phone consultation

greendoorrealxation@yahoo.ca

905-286-9466

Why should I be the one to forgive?

If you are looking at forgiveness from the traditional point of view, you might ask, “Why should I be the one to forgive? I was right, the other person was wrong. I was the one who was hurt!”

You might also wonder if by forgiving you are giving them a free licence to hurt you or your loved ones again. You might fear opening yourself up to the same hurtful experiences once again.

Traditional Forgiveness says, ‘You have done something to me; you are to blame for how I feel. You wronged me but I forgive you anyways.’ The view is that I am the victim.

New Thought Forgiveness asks ‘Why have I attracted you into my life? What is there for me to learn and overcome? What gift are you bringing into my life by being a mirror for me? How can I take responsibility for my own feelings and beliefs?’

Forgiveness IS NOT

– condoning or excusing what the other person did

– forgetting that the experience happened

– denying your feelings or saying that you are not supposed to have them

– loving the other person or even choosing to be around them

Forgiveness IS

– letting go of the story that you are a victim

– claiming your true power

– taking back your energy that you have tied up in the past

– taking responsibility for your feelings of hurt, shame, guilt, blame, anger or judgment

– intended solely for your own healing

– an act of self-love and self-respect that sets you free

– “for giving” yourself love, healing, growth, evolution and freedom

“Forgiving others is a gift to yourself, given not because the other deserves pardon,
but because you deserve the serenity and joy that comes from releasing resentment and anger, and from embracing universal forgiveness.” (Jonathan Lockwood Huie)

Forgiving does not mean forgetting; it also does not mean loving others. We can choose to forgive but still not love. It simply means taking back the energy that we have tied up with feelings for someone else.

“Forgiveness is unlocking the door to set someone free and realizing you were the prisoner!” (Max Lucado)

In a sense, we have kept the people we have not forgiven imprisoned within us. We have been standing outside their jail door to make sure they do not escape. As their guard, we have bound ourselves together with them, instead of letting them and the incident go.

Forgiveness is the gift that you give yourself, the gift that frees you from the pain that you gave yourself by judging others. Forgiveness is a choice to release, to let go; freeing up the energy that binds and blinds you. Forgiveness completes your own healing. It releases you from energy patterns that could contribute to illness or drain your energy.

“When we hate our enemies, we are giving them power over us: power over our sleep, our appetites, our blood pressure, our health, and our happiness. Our enemies would dance with joy if only they knew how they were worrying us, lacerating us, and getting even with us! Our hate is not hurting them at all, but our hate is turning our own days and nights into a hellish turmoil.” (Dale Carnegie)

The truth is that there are no enemies. People who hurt us are only teachers for us, as they mirror what we need to heal inside ourselves.

The first step of forgiveness is to feel the painful feelings without judgements, to listen to them.

How exactly are we feeling?

What are the feelings saying?

What beliefs or thoughts are underneath those feelings?

What are these feelings bringing to our awareness?

Are they perhaps triggering even older painful memories from our past?

What limiting beliefs or fears need to be healed in us?

An important part of forgiveness is self-forgiveness. Our Inner Critic at times tortures us mercilessly with feelings of guilt, shame or self-blame. It has told us how we have failed and been a disappointment. It is time to claim back that energy as well. Feelings of resentment – no matter whether directed at others or at ourselves – poison us from the inside. They can literally make us sick.

 

For coaching and forgiveness work contact me

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

905-286-9466

Letting Go of Your Stories

How do we create a future for ourselves which is abundant with love, joy, health and prosperity? A reality in which we feel empowered about what shows up in our life and how we respond to it? How do we embrace each experience as a learning opportunity on our path of personal and spiritual growth?

The key is “eliminating your need to hold on to stories from your past that no longer work for you.” (Jonathan Zenz, Centre of Spiritual Living, Toronto). The past is over. All that is real right now is the present moment. The stories do not matter anymore!

Sometimes we need to forgive others and/or ourselves in order to let go of the energy we have bound up in the past. Sometimes we need to examine our stories to find the truth for our growth, healing and evolution. Sometimes we need to face our fears to move forward into the future we really want. “The capacity of letting go of your story opens you up to a brand new story being written.” (Jonathan Zenz)

Part of letting go is realizing that life is not about being right or wrong.“We hold on to our stories because we believe they actually bring us something. We believe they make us powerful because we hold onto this idea that we were right. We were absolutely right!” (Jonathan Zenz) This obsession to be right holds us hostage to the story, to an energy of judgment and righteousness. The true power, however, lies in love.

“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing,

there is a field. I will meet you there.”

(Rumi)

When we move out into that field beyond right and wrong—into the energy of love—everything is possible. We realize that we are all wounded and that those wounds can be healed with love. We can shift into self-love and be compassionate with ourselves. We can let go of expectations and love others unconditionally.

We are co-creators of our reality. In fact, the Universe would not even exist without our participation as an intelligent force in it.

“You can either participate consciously or subconsciously. What would you rather have the experience of? Conscious, constructive, forward moving, evolutionary living—or subconscious [living], and have it all just show up?” (Jonathan Zenz)

Our experiences have formed us but they do not define who we will be tomorrow. Who we are today and who we will be tomorrow is the experience we are creating in this moment, the story we are writing right now. At any given time, we can change our life and create the kind of experiences we would rather have. We can let go of all limiting beliefs and move into abundance.

Are you ready to let go of your subconscious beliefs that hold you back? Are you prepared to examine your stories for their usefulness and let the ones go that are not for your benefit? Are you ready to forgive and just let go?

Contact me for a free consultation, or to make an appointment for coaching or belief change work.

905-286-9466

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

Forgiveness is a Gift That You Give Yourself

Forgiving does not mean to “forgive and forget.” It does not mean someone else was right in the way they acted towards us. It does not mean loving others; that may or may not happen. It just means finally letting go of an old painful “story”. It means taking back the energy that we have bound up with feelings we have about certain people. Forgiveness is not for the sake of the other person. Forgiving is “for – giving” yourself love and freedom.

Why should I forgive?

Forgiveness is the gift that you give yourself. As long as we hold grudges, resentments, shame or guilt, the energy of those feelings is poisoning us. These emotions draw our energy, cloud our minds, and give us physical pains. They are toxins. Forgiving yourself and others allows you to heal yourself. Forgiveness releases energy patterns from us that can otherwise cause illness or drain our energy.

How do I forgive?

Hypnosis, Psych-K®, and Holoenergetics®,  can help you to joyfully release the past and to forgive yourself and others. These techniques put you in a state in which you can focus on the now and expect the best for the present and for the future.

Contact me for a free consultation.

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

905-286-9466