Greendoor Relaxation

Affairs PART 1 – Assumptions Versus Facts

Some of the conventional wisdom about what causes affairs and how to repair relationships are assumptions or myths. Some of the statistical facts in regards to infidelity are surprising and thought-provoking. While some of the myths lead to judgments and are very hurtful for the affected couple, the facts help us to be compassionate with ourselves and others in a situation of betrayal. Read More about “Affairs PART 1 – Assumptions Versus Facts”…

5 Tips to Prevent Burn-Out and Conflicts This Holiday Season

Posted on by Greendoor

Here is your holiday check-list for this time of the year:

 

  1. SELF CARE

Are you making sure you can be your best self? Get enough sleep. Eat well. Up to the holidays, continue your usual self-care, like exercising, yoga, or meditation. During the days spent with extended family members, give yourself timeouts when needed. It is essential to express your needs and make requests that allow you to show up as your best self. You are creating family memories and you will be a better spouse, parent, son/daughter, sibling and so on, if you make sure you have time to recharge.

 

2. DELEGATING

Are you delegating and allowing others to help in your preparations? I know doing that can be challenging because we have ideas how things should ideally be done. When we delegate, we have to refrain from nagging or micromanaging. We have to let others do it in their time and their way.

If you choose not to ask for help or delegate, don’t load more on your shoulders than you can do while staying energized and joyful. It is so easy to take on too much, wanting to make everybody happy or have everything be perfect, and end up feeling unappreciated or resentful. I have certainly done that in the past. It is okay to make things easy for yourself. What matters is being able to enjoy each other’s company. 

 

 

3.  COMMUNICATING EXPECTATIONS

Many conflicts have to do with us making assumptions. Are you taking the time to communicate well with your spouse and other family members about expectations and hopes? Be curious what they are  envisioning. The clearer everybody is about the needs, hopes and dreams of all family members, the fewer disappointments or conflicts will arise.

 

4. MANAGING ASSUMPTIONS

We can get triggered by our extended family based on pasted experiences. Are you assuming positive intent from others? Nobody is setting out to hurt us. Everybody else is doing their best. It is most likely that they are simply feeling as rushed, anxious, insecure or stressed as we are. Or they are simply being themselves, unaware of how they might impact others.

 

5. GOING WITH THE FLOW

Last but not least: Are you prepared to be in the moment and go with the flow? Despite the best intentions, things will go differently than planned. This is an opportunity to let everything be perfectly imperfect. 

Wishing you all a Happy Holiday,

filled with relaxation, joy and good connections.