Communicating More Successfully

When I coach couples, or parents and children, the main issue is usually communication. One of the big shifts that can be made in their relationship happens by changing their way of interacting and communicating with each other.

When we judge and criticise others, they feel unloved. When we use general statements like “You always…”, we label them and push them into a corner. When we blame them, they shut down. When we want to change another person, he or she feels “not good enough”. When we try to fix them, we are forgetting that everybody–no matter what age–is perfect, whole, complete and resourceful. We all have the answers and the solutions for change inside us.

By communicating from a place of love and acceptance, you can help the other person open up to change. Successful communication uses “I” statements, expresses how YOU feel without judgement or blame and ends with a concrete request from your side, so your family member, friend or colleague knows what you need.

Marshall Rosenberg in his acclaimed book “Nonviolent Communication” explains the NVC Process as follows:

1.      State the concrete actions you have OBSERVED that affect you.

2.      Share how you FEEL in relation to what you have observed.

3.      Explain the NEEDS, values, desires etc. that create your feelings.

4.      Make a concrete REQUEST in order to improve a situation or relationship.

 

One example for non-violent communication is:

“I have NOTICED that you spend a lot of time at the gym. I FEEL a bit left out when you come home late almost every night. I WOULD LIKE to spend more quality time with. WOULD YOU BE WILLING to come home earlier once or twice a week, so we can spend more time together?”

Another example is:

“When you make negative comments about my family I FEEL criticised and embarrassed. I love them as much as I love you. I NEED to feel I can see them whenever I want. WOULD YOU BE WILLING to keep negative comments to yourself, or to focus on the good sides they all have?”

By using those steps, we are showing the willingness to be emotionally responsible and the willingness to talk straight. We are taking responsibility for our own feelings, and acknowledging our needs. Nobody makes us feel a certain way; that is an inside job. By communicating our feelings clearly, we are in integrity in our relationships.

We are also making clear requests, not demands. How do you know when you have made a request, not a demand? If it is a true request the other person has a choice to say “no”.

For Relationship Coaching contact Angelika

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

905-286-9466

Be Part of Our Changing World

What is your vision for the future of our world?

Is it one of sharing and cooperation as opposed to greed and selfishness? Is it one of an abundance of health, wealth and happiness for all? Is it one of awakening the entire humanity to love, wholeness and prosperity? Is it one of a harmonious community that learns from and cares for each other? Is it one of recognizing that we are all one and that we can save this planet as one united, loving force?

The Burlington Wholistic Wellness Expo is a perfect example that our world is already changing.

Come out on Saturday, March 29th, 2014 to meet and support over 80 heart-centred practitioners and vendors who are sowing the seeds for many different paths to achieve natural health and wellness. All exhibitors recognize that our future lies in addressing natural and wholistic methods, which include the emotional, mental and spiritual side of healing as much as the physical.

There is one entrance fee. Once inside, all 15-minute sessions with the participating practitioners are free. You can sample from a variety of alternative techniques, natural methods and healthy products.

If you are interested in experiencing this high vibrational event and in purchasing tickets ($25.00), contact Angelika for details:

905-286-9466

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

Or go to this website and order online:

http://burlingtonwholisticwellnessexpo.com/eventdetails.htm#Buy:32Tickets

BurlingtonWellnessExpo2014

Muscles Testing to Access Higher Wisdom

The K in PSYCH-K® stands for Kinesiology. PSYCH-K® uses muscle testing to access the subconscious mind as well as the superconscious mind. How does this work?

We cannot say something that our subconscious does not believe to be true without getting a comparably weaker muscle response. When we say something that our subconscious believes to be true, the isolated muscle in the arm remains strong, or as we say “locks in”.

Everybody has a different muscle response. Muscle testing is not about absolute strength but about the difference between somebody’s muscle response when you compare a true and a false statement. When the person lies, there is a stress response in the body. When we state something that our subconscious does not agree with, we experience a diminished electrical signal to the muscle. We cannot hold up the arm in the same way as we can when we speak the truth. This allows us to determine what the subconscious mind holds to be true at any given point.

We create our experiences based on our subconscious beliefs. We all have beliefs that are supportive in reaching our goals, and beliefs that are limiting or holding us back from manifesting into our lives what we really want. Once it has been determined that the person is not supported by their subconscious in a belief that would be beneficial to them, the work begins.

Every subconscious belief can be changed. A very important element of PSYCH-K® however, is to follow a permission protocol. The superconscious mind needs to give permission to change a specific belief at any given time. This, again, is determined through muscle testing.

Beyond asking permission from that higher wisdom to do a belief change, we can also follow the guidance of the Higher Self. The PSYCH-K® belief change processes are easy to learn. The art of PSYCH-K® is to step back and allow the Higher Self—which is free of any human attachments—to communicate and guide us to the right statements.

For individual PSYCH-K® sessions or PSYCH-K® training classes with Darryl Gurney in Ontario contact

Angelika

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

905-286-9466

The next PSYCH-K® Basic class with Darryl Gurney will be in spring 2014, the next PSYCH-K® Advanced class in early summer 2014.