Who do you judge? – The Story of the Immoral Girlfriend

A girlfriend of mine—let’s call her Anne—broke off the contact with a long-time close girlfriend of hers. Sometimes relationships are not meant to last a lifetime, but I was still curious as to what would prompt Anne to act in such a way.

The reason was Anne’s husband. Her husband felt very strongly that he did not want to be around his wife’s girlfriend, nor that his wife should be friends with her. His reason for putting his wife under pressure to break off the friendship was the fact that the girlfriend had an affair with a married man at the time.

Now, this is not at all about the question of whether it is right or wrong to have a relationship with someone who is married; you can answer that question for yourself. Instead, I would like to take a look at the strong reaction that this man had to the girlfriend and her life choices.

Why was the husband—let’s call him Grant—so triggered by the situation? It was almost like Grant was afraid the adultery was catching. Did he not trust his wife to make better choices than her girlfriend? Or did Grant not trust himself?

When we sit on a high moral horse and judge others harshly it usually reflects something about ourselves. His wife’s girlfriend was mirroring one of Grant’s shadow sides. Maybe he had been affected in some way by adultery when he was younger and had not let go of his past yet. The situation might have been a reminder for him to heal his own wounds. Or maybe she was mirroring that he had thought about being unfaithful himself. Or maybe she was mirroring that he had in some form been dishonest in relationships.

I don’t know what happened to the girlfriend but I am quite sure breaking off the friendship did not “make her see the error of her ways.” Judging has never helped someone who might be lost on their path to get back to making healthier choices. As her friend, his wife could have encouraged the girlfriend to believe that she deserves better than a married man. And most importantly, she could have trusted the girlfriend to eventually make the best choice and learn from the situation.


Who do you judge? Who triggers you so much that you feel like cutting all ties with them? What do they show you about your own disowned shadow parts?

For Information on the four-day Shadow Energetics Workshop in Mississauga go to calendar.

How Your Beliefs Sabotage Your Weight Loss

Do you find that you start on a new diet or exercise regime and then give up half way through?  Have you repeatedly sabotaged your efforts to be slim, trim and healthy?

Science has shown that 85% of the choices we make and the actions we take are made by our subconscious mind. The subconscious mind operates on the premise to protect us, based on beliefs that we have often learned at a very young age.

If your subconscious believes that it is hard and unpleasant to lose weight, that you can’t lose weight, that change is scary or that somehow it is safer for you to remain overweight, then that is what will be true for you. Until these old beliefs are changed at a subconscious level, they can continue to sabotage your weight loss and exercise goals.

I invite you to take a look at what you were feeling and thinking just before you sabotaged your last diet or stopped exercising.

Also ask yourself honestly:

What does the weight allow me to do?

What could be a negative consequence of losing weight?

What does the weight prevent me from doing?


You might be surprised that your answers are along the lines of

“I don’t have to move forward with my life.”

“My sister / friend / mother etc. accepts and likes me this way.”

“I don’t have to be intimate.”

Don’t judge yourself and dismiss the idea if something comes up that seems “silly.” Go with your first insight or feeling; you will be on the right track to discover how your subconscious is trying to protect you.

Some examples of limiting beliefs could be:

– “I have always been overweight.” or “It runs in my family to be overweight.”

– “Wanting to be slim and fit means I am immoral / superficial etc.”

– “People close to me will be jealous and not like me anymore when I am skinny.”

– “I don’t deserve to take care of myself.”

Uncovering these limiting beliefs, understanding them and clearing them out with techniques like Hypnosis and/or Psych-K® makes a huge difference in being able to attain your goals for a healthy happy life and maintaining your ideal weight.


Come out for a

FREE Seminar on Psych-K® and Limiting Beliefs around WEIGHT LOSS and EXERCISING

I will be speaking to limiting beliefs, fears, and challenges we face and how we can change that “self talk” at the subconscious level to better serve our health and weight loss goals!

Stephanie Lowe of Destiny Fitness will also cover some key exercise and meditation strategies you can use toward your success.

Wednesday, April 24th from 7:00 pm to shortly after 8:00 pm.


224-A Queen Street South

Mississauga (Streetsville), Ontario

Please RSVP for this free seminar with Stephanie Lowe! Spaces are limited.





Or book a session to uncover your sabotaging beliefs and to change them with techniques like hypnosis and/or Psych-K® into beliefs that support you. Your dream of feeling attractive, slim, healthy, full of energy and thoroughly happy is in reach!

Contact me for a free phone consultation





Emotional Triggers for Overeating and How PSYCH-K® and Hypnosis Can Help

It is 9 o’clock at night; you are finally relaxing, maybe sitting in front of the TV. All day long you have made reasonable eating choices, you had dinner and you are not really hungry. However, something drives you to go to the fridge or cupboard and look for a snack. You know the snack will make you feel better, it will help you to relax, be a nice reward or distraction.

This is the moment to stop right there and ask yourself what negative emotion you are trying to distract yourself from. What were you just feeling before you got up to go to the fridge?

Your response might be to say, I felt bored, or I felt tired, or I felt like I needed a treat. But we might have to go deeper to really understand and eliminate the emotional trigger.

Emotional eating is one of the biggest sabotaging factors when losing weight or maintaining your ideal weight. As long as your subconscious does not support you fully in your health goals and operates on limiting beliefs losing weight and maintaining that weight might always be a struggle.

Such limiting beliefs are:

I need my comfort foods.

I am always hungry.

Eating is a good distraction from negative feelings.

Eating makes me feel good (safe / comforted / happy / loved / calm like me / relaxed… etc.)

These beliefs can be re-programmed using Psych-K® and/or Hypnosis with supportive beliefs like:

I easily let go of all emotional reasons for overeating.

I am free of emotional eating.

I stop and think before I eat.

I distinguish clearly between physical hunger and emotional hunger.

I satisfy my emotional hunger in appropriate ways.

When I am tired, I rest.

When I feel sad, I…

When I feel scared, I…

When I am bored I always find something better to do than to eat.

If you want to find out more about techniques to eliminate limiting beliefs and emotions that lead to emotional eating come to a

FREE Seminar on PSYCH-K® and Limiting Beliefs around WEIGHT LOSS and EXERCISING

I will be speaking to limiting beliefs, fears, challenges we face and how we can change that “self talk” at the subconscious level to better serve our health and weight loss goals!

Stephanie Lowe of Destiny Fitness will also cover some key exercise and meditation strategies you can use toward your success.

Wednesday, April 24th from 7:00pm to shortly after 8:00pm.

LOCATION: Mississauga (Streetsville)

Please RSVP for this free seminar! Spaces are limited.

Stephanie Lowe



Shadow Energetics Conference Call

Are you intrigued by shadow work and would like to find out more? Here is a chance to be on a FREE conference call with Darryl Gurney and ask all the questions you might have.

Call Tuesday, April 16th, 8:00 pm – 9:15 pm Eastern time
Dial-in number: 1-559-670-1000 
Participant Access Code: 686864

Darryl: “Shadow work has been a passion of mine since I studied with Hal and Sidra Stone who are the founders of Voice Dialogue. The understanding I got from them has proved invaluable in my own personal journey and has played a major role in the work with my clients. My clients Higher Selves are constantly asking to have them integrate this or that part of themselves that got lost somewhere along the line. I have come to realize that the game of life is for us to move into wholeness and unconditional Self-Love, this aligns us with the very essence of the universe, once aligned or intentions carry much more power and our ability to manifest is greatly enhanced. This inner work helps us achieve deeper peace in our relationships and we become more choiceful and therefore more conscious. We get to meet and come to understand our inner child which has so many gifts for us that will deeply enrich our lives. It is this understanding gained from my experience working with folks that has led me in this new direction. I recognize the significance of shadow work as I have seen such a profound personal transformation in myself and others. What I am so excited about is that my background in energy psychology has allowed me to create processes which allow us to accurately identify our shadow and integrate it back into our lives much, much more efficiently then with traditional methods.

So please join me on this conference call and I will share more of what this work is all about and I will do my best to answer any questions that you may have.”

For Information on the four day Shadow Energetics Workshop in Mississauga go to calendar

“Our Body Speaks Our Mind”

Deb Shapiro’s “Our Body Speaks Our Mind” is one of four books that I reference to get more clarity on the connection between physical issues and emotional, mental and spiritual challenges my clients face. Other authors who explain these connections include Louise Hay, Lise Bourbeau, and Narayan-Singh.

Another thing I reference when people come in with physical symptoms is my own intuition and a higher guidance. PSYCH-K® allows me to connect with the person’s energy and gain valuable insights into what is going on and what they need.

Sometimes people listen to their bodies early on. However, most people are so used to ignoring their physical signs and “fixing” them with medications that they don’t stop to ask what is going on until their symptoms are quite severe or chronic.

Here are some examples.

– One of my female clients had regular severe bladder infections. Her body was developing a resistance to the most common antibiotics. She realized that she would get a bladder infection each time she was “pissed at” her husband and instead of expressing her emotions appropriately was turning them inward. She learned to deal with her emotions differently and the bladder infections stopped completely.

– One of my male clients suffered from chronic rheumatoid arthritis. Once he realized that his attacks were connected to being extremely critical with not just all the people around him, but especially with himself, he was able to shift his issue. As he was learning to love and approve of himself and of his loved ones, his arthritis improved.

– When I do diabetes motivational coaching, one part of coming to terms with the diagnosis and the required life changes is to understand that diabetes is connected to the feeling that there is “no sweetness in life.” It is a call to change one’s experience to one of living in every moment and of experiencing life as sweet and joyful.

– A young client of mine gets regular sinus infections each time she is “fed up” and overwhelmed. She is literally stuffed up with her “stuff” and irritated with the situation she is in or with a person around her. Her body is telling her quite clearly, “You had enough!” The more she understands this connection the more she can learn to create more peaceful and harmonious experiences for herself and surround herself with less irritating people.