Going With the Flow

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes.

Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow.

Let reality be reality.

Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.”

Lao-Tzu

What I especially like about this quote is the reminder to let reality be reality. How often do we ignore the reality we do not like or which nudges us to take action? We resist listening to what presents itself and hold on to the status quo. But what does it mean to go with the flow of things?

“Go with the flow” has become a very popular phrase. It means a state of nonresistance which encourages you to flow with life as if you are flowing on a river. “Go with the flow” is such a simple short and sweet statement. However, there are some pitfalls in this mantra.

Like many “spiritual” principles, the idea contains an apparent contradiction. Because of this, we might interpret the principle as “let life happen without using your will power.” It is quite easy to see “go with a flow” as a call to inactivity, inaction or laziness, waiting for things to fall into your lap, making the choice not to make a choice. When we don’t make a choice, another person makes it for us, or the situation becomes so unbearable that the decision is forced upon us. Inactivity is not what this spiritual principle means.

It is often quite easy to trick the mind into confusing going with the flow with maintaining the status quo of things, because our subconscious mind likes a sense of equilibrium. It prefers experiences that are familiar, pleasant and comfortable. When its sense of equilibrium is threatened, we unconsciously might choose to stay with what is familiar even if a part of us knows it’s not good for us.

That applies each time you are confronted with a situation or a person’s actions that are not acceptable but you are hesitating to take action. An example would be if you are dealing with somebody who is being passive-aggressive: someone is making rude, disrespectful or hurtful comments about you and disguising it as humor. “Oh, I am just kidding. Have a sense of humour!” Your sense of equilibrium may tell you to be silent about it instead of risking a fight. You may feel some physical response, perhaps some tension in the body, in your solar plexus or in your throat chakra, that prevents you from claiming your power and speaking up, speaking your truth.

But your body is actually telling you that you are not really going with the flow but that you are avoiding to unsettle the status quo. If we want to stay happy, healthy and, most importantly, true to ourselves, we need to listen to our intuition. If you listen to your intuition and speak up calmly and assertively to this person, your body gives you the feedback that you are on the right path. Your throat chakra clears up or your solar plexus settles down. You notice a sudden freedom, a greater “flow” and an increased ability to embrace life’s experiences as life unfolds.

You might have thought that going with the flow was about accepting the inappropriate comments or behaviour, just ignoring reality. But after exercising your assertiveness, you realize that acceptance means accepting the experience and letting go of the hurt, but not of the lesson this person has taught you. It is about following the call to action that the comments were inviting. You truly went with the flow. This person’s job was to teach you something about self-respect. You might even want to thank them (or the Universe) for the lesson.

Meditation can help us learn to go with the flow.  It gives us the clarity to see why certain doors or paths have been closed for us. That usually happens when we are not supposed to be in a certain place, be that a particular job or certain relationship, when we are meant to be somewhere different. It shows us new doors to knock on or doors that have already started to open for us. It also helps us understand where our fear of change has tricked us into believing it is best to “keep the peace”, keep the status quo of a situation, even if we sacrifice being authentic and happy. It helps us decide how to move forward, go with the flow to get to where we really want to go, be who we really want to be.

Join me for this meditation below to contemplate where in your life you can go more with the flow. You might also want to check out other free 10-15 minute long meditations.

 

 At the Other Side of Each Shadow…

I had an interesting choice to make just recently, and with it came a bit of a light bulb moment. I had the opportunity to point out to somebody that they are out of integrity and that they are justifying their actions by using what one might call spiritual jargon. Like everybody, I have a self-righteous part that pipes up at times and judges something as unfair or “not right”. That self-righteous part in me would have loved to step out and ask this person if she was really feeling good about treating another person, who was kind and generous to her in the past, the way she is.

But then instead of sending it out right away, I sat with the email I had written. The quiet voice inside said, “Wait, don’t just respond impulsively”. I talked to my friend Darryl Gurney, whose insights and perspective I have always appreciated. He agreed that the person was probably coming from fear, showing up with a surprising lack of integrity and a lower consciousness level than one would expect.

He also reminded me though that when somebody shows up in one of their shadows, we need to remember that at the other side of that shadow is a truly lovely energy. We all have ALL energy inside of us.

When somebody acts from a place of self-centredness, dishonour, aggression, unscrupulousness, greed, or from any other shadow side, we need to remind ourselves that they are also selfless, honest, peaceful, conscious of their actions, fair, and willing to share at other times. The reason why they are choosing to act from their shadow and to justify their actions with seemingly reasonable arguments and/or pseudo-spiritual non-sense, is that they are in fear.

Maybe they are in fear around their financial situation, or in fear of losing something or someone. Maybe they feel disconnected and unloved. Maybe they are in fear of speaking up from a place of integrity because somebody else in their life might not understand or agree. There could be a million reasons why we are out of integrity and choosing to pretend that we are not. Another truth is that we have all been out of integrity ourselves at some point in our life. I certainly know I have.

When somebody makes choices which are not the strongest choices they could make, it is sometimes challenging not to judge. However, a situation like this is a test to just let it be and trust that the Universe has a way of taking care of things.

Beach & Ho'oponopono

So, instead of writing my email, I decided to sit and do the Ho’oponopono Ritual to shift the feelings I have for, and my energy towards, this person. Hoʻoponopono is an ancient Hawaiian practice of reconciliation and forgiveness. It consists of four sentences to forgive and let go, and to raise our vibration to a vibration of love:

I am sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you.

With the Ho’oponopono prayer, we take responsibility for whatever we are experiencing in our life. It is a spiritual truth that everything that shows up in our lives is there for a reason and for our highest good, even if we don’t see it at the time. It is also a spiritual belief that before we started this life we chose the major events of our lives. Sometimes this has brought us pain. However, many of our greatest insights come from painful experiences and we have the chance to grow from those experiences. With this meditation we can make peace with people and situations that have brought us pain, anger, resentment or other difficulties. We can include people close to us or someone we have not even met but whose actions have affected us in some way.

 

Life & Spiritual Coaching, Belief Change Work, Shadow Work

Angelika, 905-286-9466, greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

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Connecting With a Loved One Who Has Passed On

One of the most powerful and deeply heart opening experiences is the PSYCH-K® Relationship Balance with a loved one who has passed on. In this process another person stands in for the soul who has passed. It gives the client an opportunity to deeply connect once again with a family member or friend who has crossed over and to say and/or hear what they always wanted to hear. The more intuitive the stand in happens to be the more touching the experience often is.

At the four day Advanced PSYCH-K® this November, we had several deeply healing encounters which involved bringing somebody in who is not in a physical body anymore. The experience often brings peace to the person who was left behind to continue this life. They might not have had a chance to say good-bye, or to hear what they always hoped to hear from their loved one.

This can also be a huge growth experience for the stand-in. The stand in person can experience what it is like to intuitively tune into the energy of the passed on person and to sense what needs to still be said. Some people are so good at surrogating for the passed on spirit that they can literally feel all the emotions and channel the energy and words from the other side.

 

Here are some testimonials from participants…

Carolyn:

“My Dad, Mike, died in September 2012, four days before my birthday, very quickly, within six weeks, from an aggressive multiple myeloma cancer. He didn’t like it, but he exuded great dignity and pride during this time. My mom and I speak to him often but lately I have had the wish to see him again and to hear him speak to me.

In preparation for this workshop, I already received different messages that my Dad is around. Just recently, my car died in the middle of nowhere, when I noticed a sign saying “Mike’s Auto Parts and Service”. It was a Sunday morning at 9:00 a.m. What was the likelihood of anybody being in the shop to help me? I called and the garage owner, Mike, was in his shop working on the car of his own daughter. This is just one message of several.

When James volunteered to surrogate for my Dad, my Dad saw his chance and jumped right in. That is exactly what he was like. And he would have picked a gentle soul like James to come through. James just went with the flow and intuitively channelled the perfect words.

The experience was very touching and moving. Love beyond Love. It was a Divine gift of love, a miracle, to hold and hug my dad and to feel his love once again. It was deeply moving to exchange words and emotions. When my Dad asked through James how my mom was and I said she is doing great, he said “Are you sure?” I again felt that this is exactly what he would ask. The words “I have faith in you,” which James spoke to me in my father’s place during the bonding part of the process resonated deeply with me and ties into what I have been focusing on lately to step into my full potential. The words “You are enough, “I said to my Dad were powerful and healing, spoken from love and truth, freeing him from error perceptions and opening the door for my Dad’s soul transformation and growth. And ultimately affecting the growth and change of all of us. Beautiful!

I feel that James and I gave each other a great gift. I had another chance to speak to my Dad and James was able to experience that we can all channel the energy of another person, whether on the earth plane or the spirit world.”

Carolyn and her dad MikeCarolyn and her dad

James stood in for Carolyn’s Dad Mike who passed on two years ago. This is how James experienced being the surrogate:

“Before we could even ask permission for me to surrogate for Mike, he literally “jumped in”. It felt like my knees got weak and I immediately had an incredible sense of love and joy in my heart. All pain in my own body dissipated. I had an overwhelming feeling that I was really looking at my own child who I hadn’t seen in a long while. I took a step towards her and was guided to hug her and hold her like she was my daughter. The facilitator stepped back and allowed us our moment of reconnecting. Our conversation just flowed easily and naturally but I cannot recall anymore than what I was guided to say to my daughter.

The facilitator muscle tested the belief points but they were all strong. So we proceeded to the bonding part of this process which gives both partners an opportunity to hear what they need to hear. Intuitively, I knew that Carolyn needed to hear her dad say, “I have faith in you”. The phrase just popped into my mind. I also felt that Mike needed to hear that he was enough as a father.

It was extremely touching to do this bonding ritual of using a whole brain movement and taking turns telling each other what we needed to hear. We cried tears of joy and happiness. I feel so honoured to have been able to allow Carolyn to connect with her dad again.”

bridge & light

Aliesha:

“At the Advanced Psych K Workshop my intention was to work on myself with a focus on releasing the sadness that I hold, especially when it comes to my Father’s death.  I was 9 years old when he died and just 7 years old when he was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma Cancer.  I was very close to my Dad when he died, I was ‘Daddy’s little girl’ and so his death was especially traumatic for me.

I only had to look at Andrew, who was surrogating for my Dad, Ward and I started to cry.  Andrew had similar facial features to my Dad.  I can’t put into words the way Andrew looked at me, I was looking at my Dad.  When the facilitator muscle tested both us, my Dad was strong and I went weak.  I had many weak points and that didn’t surprise me.  His death has had a huge impact on my life.  Each time I turned to face my Dad I started to cry.  I could just feel how much I missed him.  What was interesting though, as we balanced the statements, I could feel myself starting feel better, stronger, lighter somehow.  When it came time to the statements, I was to come up with both of them.  In the moment, there were so many things to say but only a few came to mind.  ‘I miss you so much Dad’ was mine and his was ‘I wanted to be here for you, I never wanted to leave’.

I never felt like I had the opportunity to say goodbye to my Dad, and I always felt that if I was somehow different, he’d still be here.  So to hear those words from him, I was touched beyond words.  The best part though, I got to hug him and what a beautifully long hug!  At that point we just exchanged words and I said, “I know I have to let you go, but I don’t want to.” And that’s when he said “I love you, I’m always with you; you’re always in my heart and just look inside your heart, that’s where you’ll always find me.”

This experience was incredibly touching for me.  It’s easy to try and tell yourself something consciously, it’s another to experience how deep the wounds go and how light you can feel after.  I don’t know how to put into words how I felt after, except lighter, more compassion for myself and faith that he’s still with me, still my Dad and I don’t feel nearly as sad.  I am deeply grateful for the experience and would do it again in a heartbeat!!“

 

A relationship balance can shift a relationship to one which is free of triggers and more loving, or it can bring closure to a relationship.

To do a PSYCH-K® Relationship Balance or a Shadow Energetics Relationship Alignment with somebody who is still alive or who has passed on contact

Angelika

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

905-286-9466

Why have I not attracted what I want?

The Law of Attraction always works. It responds reliably to our thoughts and feelings. If you have not managed to manifest what you really want, it could be that you are not clear enough about the FEELING of what you want. Or it could be that you have a limited “mental equivalent” of what you want.

“If we are to draw from Life what we want, we must first think it forth into Life. It always produces what we think. In order to have success, we must first conceive it in our own thought. This is not because we are creators, but because the flow of Life into manifestation, through us, must take the form we give to it, and if we want a thing we must have within ourselves the mental equivalent before we get it.” (E. Holmes)

What does Ernest Holmes mean by that?

If you want to be successful in your business but you hold yourself back due to limiting beliefs, you will only get to a certain level. You have a mental equivalent of limited success. Underneath that idea of limited success can be beliefs around not deserving, or not being able to do something.

If you want love but you believe you cannot leave your loveless marriage, all you will get is something like an affair on the side. You only have the mental equivalent for a limited expression of love. At the basis of this mental equivalent could be a lack of self-love and self-respect.

If you want to be financially abundant but you believe you can only reach a certain standard of living, you won’t manifest beyond that boundary. You only have a limited mental equivalent of prosperity. Limiting beliefs around money or yourself might be at the root of this.

If you want to live a relationship with your children, that flows well, but you buy into the idea that teenagers are difficult, you will encounter problems. You only have the mental equivalent for a limited relationship with them. We can shift your perception of them and yourself to create a relationship characterized by love and understanding.

If you want perfect health but you believe you get sick when someone in your family is ill, you will get sick. You have a mental equivalent of limited health. We can clear out limiting beliefs about your health, the natural healing ability of your body, and about aging.

The good news is: Your subconscious can re-learn anything. Any limiting belief can be released and replaced by one that supports your goals.

Do you need help finding and changing your limiting beliefs that are holding you back from true success, deep love, unlimited prosperity, harmonic relationships, and perfect health? Are you struggling to develop a clear mental equivalent of what you want?

Contact Angelika for Life and Spiritual Coaching, Psych-K® Belief Change Work or Hypnosis.

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

902-286-9466

Happiness – Do it Like the Ducks

Last week, I was on vacation with an old friend of mine. She is an amazing, conscious soul and throughout the week, when “life just happened,” she would smile at me and say, “Let’s do it like the ducks and shake this off.” She would literally pretend to flap her “wings”, make us all laugh out loud and then move on.

She was referencing Eckhard Tolle. In his book “A New Earth” he explains that in order to be happy with what shows up, we have to make peace by letting go of any negative thoughts. Tolle observed that after two ducks get into a fight they each flap their wings vigorously a few times to get rid of the surplus energy.

As human beings, we get stuck in our stories. We are resentful because of what happened or because things did not go according to plan. The lesson we can learn from the ducks is: flap your wings. Shake off the energy you feel after a negative encounter, let go of the stories you tell yourself, turn off that voice that wants to hold onto negativity, and return to the only place of power: the present moment. Give yourself permission to be happy right here, right now.

Stop complaining! Instead of focusing on what is negative or lacking or did not go according to plan, let it go and move forward. Complaining is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Being in the moment is a choice. You can do it like the ducks and shake off any energy that keeps you from being happy in the moment.

“Let us waste no further time looking for the secret of success or the key to happiness. Already the door is open and whosoever will, may enter.”

(Ernest Holmes)

 

Life and Spiritual Coaching in the GTA (Mississauga)

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

905-286-9466

 

Do You Want to Heal a Relationship?

Some of the most beautiful and most rewarding work I do is around helping people heal their relationships. Each time I have the honour to facilitate a relationship alignment for a client, I know I am in complete synch with my life purpose to raise the vibration on this planet.  

We are all living in relationships, with our partner, with our children, with our parents, with members of the extended family, with work colleagues and friends. Each time one of us shifts the energy in a relationship away from judgment, anger, resentment, hurt, sadness, disappointment, etc. to pure love, we are taking a step closer to a planet of light and complete peace.

The beauty of this process is that it is not necessary for both people in the relationship to be physically present. Another person can stand in for an absent partner. Because we are all energetically connected, we can make shifts by balancing the chakras for both people and transform the issues and learning that arises.

You can balance the energy with someone who is still in your life and improve that relationship significantly, or with someone from the past to release an old relationship and to finally be free to move on. We can even do an alignment with someone who has already crossed over to still bring healing into that relationship.

A relationship alignment, which is a process from Shadowenergetics, is deeply touching, not just to experience, but also to witness. Each chakra is associated with different issues (support, respect, forgiveness, love, understanding, appreciation, just to name a few) and particular statements to work through as the two partners are opening up to a deep connection with each other. The stand-in partner is often surprised how much he or she can pick up intuitively about the feelings and thoughts of the person he or she is surrogating for. For both people, the process is usually emotional; the personal and spiritual learning is eye opening.

 

Is there someone in your life you want to have a truly harmonious and loving relationship with? Someone you have been struggling to have a good relationship with but you can just never quite manage to improve it? Now you can!

Call me or email me for more information on how to bring respect, appreciation, understanding and love into any relationship.

905-286-9466

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

Finding the Nuggets

A very special woman said to me yesterday when we spoke about why she loves her holistic work, “I like to find the nuggets in people”. How beautiful is that?

She is igniting the light inside others. She is finding the talents in people that will encourage them to sparkle and shine.

This interaction with her reminded me of a quote by Michelangelo:

“I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free”

Everything is in us already. We are born absolutely perfect, with everything inside us to live a fulfilling life full of happiness, creativity and abundance. All we need to do is trust that the light is there and look for it. We are each other’s “nugget diggers”.

How about we set an intention for today to find the nuggets in our partner, in our children, in our parents, in our friends, in our neighbours? Look for the light in the person opposite, acknowledge it and let them know.

And when they in return find one of your “nuggets,” be open to receiving the feedback. When you feel resistance to see your own light, remember that it is just fear coming up, old belief systems of not being worthy or good enough. This frequently-used quote by Marianne Willamson illustrates that perfectly:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do.”

For those of you who want help uncovering their nuggets, give me a call for a free consultation on how spiritual and life coaching, and belief change techniques such as Psych-K® can help you.

905-286-9466

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca

I am fabulous!

“How are you?”

“I am fabulous!” Mr. P responds with a big smile, his eyes sparkling with joy.

Mr. P is a friend of mine, a very conscious teacher at an elementary school. He strides though the hallways with a bounce in his step and an uplifting and catching energy around him. He meditates with his students, sees the best in every child, and shares a smile with every one of them. He loves his job; he loves life!

When you ask Mr. P how he is, he never just replies “I am good.” His reply is, “I am fabulous!” or “I am fantastic!” or at the very least, “I am wonderful!” Even just the tone of his voice says, “It’s an amazing day!”

The other day, the custodian passed by, and upon receiving the answer, “I am fabulous!” he paused and commented, “You always say you are fabulous, Mr. P. How can that be? Nobody can always feel that good!”

Mr. P’s simple reply was, “I have the choice to be miserable – or to feel fabulous. I choose to feel fabulous.”

I am sure the custodian is not the only one who has wondered about this. What belief systems do most of us struggle with to make us believe that nobody can feel this good all the time? We are affected by old beliefs that tell us that life is hard, that it’s a struggle, that we cannot possibly have it all, that we don’t deserve to be happy all the time, or that if we get too happy something will surely happen to bring us down to the tough reality.

Is that really how you want to live your life?

Or would you like to experience it like Mr. P who spreads his joy and love to everybody he meets?

It all starts with making the decision to shift from gloom and fear to joy and love. You are worthy of happiness! You can feel fabulous! You ARE fabulous!

Let’s clear out all the old beliefs systems and fears that are in the way of you opening up to your full magnificence.

To learn more about the life and spiritual coaching I do, about PSYCH-K®, Shadow Energetics or hypnosis, and how these techniques help to shift your subconscious beliefs, give me a call for a free consultation! 

905-286-9466

greendoorrelaxation@yahoo.ca